Funny story: We went to my sister-in-law’s for a little party. Unbeknownst to us, a covey (gaggle? herd? flock?) of wasps built their nest under the porch swing. My niece, Andrea (pictured to the left), was sitting on said porch swing when one wasp decided that he didn’t enjoy the party. Flying angrily up from the swing, he stung Andrea on the eyelid.
Okay, that part is not funny. Here’s the funny part: No one knew what to do. All these farm people are walking around acting like they’ve never seen someone get stung or that they’ve never been stung themselves. They yelled at me search the internet for solutions for treating a wasp sting. The first thing WebMD says is call 911. As is often true when people ask me medical advice, no one followed it once given.
My sister-in-law (we’ll call her Kim because that’s her name), looked up some remedies on Pinterest (seriously). The best advice this sage site, better known for its crockpot recipes and fashion ideas, could offer was to put a copper penny on the sting. They found a penny.
Someone suggested ice to reduce the swelling. They found ice; Andrea’s husband bagged a handful and pressed it to her face. But how do you hold a penny and ice on a person’s face? Of course, you use a bandana to tie it to her head.
Perhaps the best medical treatment came when, to calm her nerves and reduce everyone’s stress, someone fixed Andrea a Margarita. There is nothing I enjoy more than watching an emotionally charged young woman in pain with an imprint of Abraham Lincoln stamped on her eyelid and an ice pack strapped to her head sipping on a cocktail.
We should have these parties more often.