My Newest Venture

By all accounts, I am an entrepreneur. With a little creativity and a lot of hard work, I’ve been able to earn funds from funerals and gather wealth from weddings. I’ve written blog posts for-profit and gardened for a little green. I was lucrative at landscaping and remunerated for my writings. In short, I am always looking for a way to make money.

And so, when I bought my new-to-me John Deere L130 garden tractor last fall, I knew there had to be a way to cash in: Enter my neighbor.

Having hired my kids to mow his yard each summer for the past decade, I knew he would be seeking a replacement lawn-boy after the boys moved out last autumn. As the grass turned green this spring, I subtly dropped the hint that I would be happy to mow his yard, but of course, only if he wanted me to. I knew I could knock his yard out in record time with my new 48-inch cutting deck and the teeth-rattling 23-horsepower under the green hood. Reluctant at first, he quickly signed on after he mowed his own yard the first time this year.

I was thrilled! A yard that took my boys 60 minutes to push mow would take me a mere 20 minutes of comfortable riding. For very little effort, I would make quite a bit of dough.

My neighbor paid the boys $25 per mowing job. However, because we are friends, I’m only charging $20. Unfortunately, problems started early on when my “friend” texted me one evening as the thunderclouds began to form on the horizon. He wanted me to mow before the rain hit; a difficult task as I was just finishing my own perfectly manicured lawn. The tension began to rise when I explained how his last-minute request fit into my pricing schedule:

  1. The Friend and Family Rate ($20) = This is subject to change by how snotty you are if I don’t respond to your beck and call (See #4)
  2. The Convenience Rate ($35) = I mow at my own convenience
  3. The Use-To-Be Friends & Family Rate ($50 + the cost of gas) = (See #1)
  4. The Emergency Rate ($75) = My car payment is due so I’m mowing your yard whether you need me to or not.
  5. The It’s About To Rain Rate ($85) = You didn’t look at the weather and now you need your yard mowed right away.

His text request clearly fell into price #5. However, the argument was entirely my fault. I failed to provide my pricing schedule upfront.  My neighbor was under the impression that every yard mowing came in at the Friends & Family Rate.

To alleviate any future confusion…or fistfights…I’ve decided that I should print business cards with my services outlined (blog writing, weddings, funerals, lawn mowing) and the pricing schedule for each. I expect that I should soon be able to retire from my day job and simply drive around the neighborhood on my mower, cutting grass, performing weddings, the occasional funeral, and writing blogs about my experience, raking in the cash as I roll!

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