Dear Austin’s Acre:
I just finished reading, “The Question Without An Answer.” I believe there are sub-sections to Option #2 which you failed to mention.
Of course, it is mandatory to answer NO and to answer quickly. “NO dear,” is even better. I have learned, slowly, because I am also an idiot, that it helps to look up and at the dress, when quickly saying, “NO dear.”
When pressed for clarification, I avoid the trap by going with Option #2, Parts B or C. This is where looking up at the dress comes in handy. If it does make her look fat, you use Option #2, Part B: “I think you look sexier in that other dress” (describe any other dress using a color and length.)
If by chance, you are bored, focused on a basketball game, and/or the Sunday Comics; or if you cannot quickly think of a dress to describe, go with Option #2, Part C: Tell her “No. You don’t look fat. I fact, you look so sexy in the dress you are wearing that I want to have sex right here and now.”
This will of course create an argument about sex, but arguing about sex is much more fun than arguing about how fat you wife is.
Fighting for Sex in Japan