If you are a man and if you have been married for any length of time you know the dilemma. It might happen early in your wedded bliss. It might come later in your well-worn marriage. But eventually the fateful question is asked, “Does this outfit make me look fat?”
Now, once the question has been asked there are only a limited number of responses; none of them are acceptable.
Option #1: Yes. Go ahead. Say it. Say, “Yes.” I promise to visit you in the hospital. I even have a sofa to sleep on when you are discharged.
Option #2: No. Give that a try. Go ahead. Don’t be afraid.
“No.” You say to her.
“Are you sure?” she asks with a raise of her eyebrow.
“Yes. It makes me look fat or Yes, you are sure?”
“Yes. I am sure.”
“But I FEEL fat.”
“But you don’t LOOK fat.”
“What does that mean?” both eyebrows are raised at this point.
“It means you don’t…look…fat.”
“So you saying I AM fat but this outfit just doesn’t show it?”
When I was young and stupid (as opposed to old and stupid), my wife and I had a conversation about a friend. I mentioned that her friend was a large woman. My wife informed me that this was okay because (and I’m using her exact words here), “She’s not fat. She’s just big-boned.”
Fast-forward ten years