Splitting Hairs

The New Year is off with a bang and 2006 promises to be quite interesting.

My 10-year-old son has made one New Years’ Resolution. His logo for 2006 is to “Try New Things”. The other day he boldly stuck a fork into a sardine, placed it in his mouth, and chewed thoughtfully.

He mulled over the taste with closed eyes. I feared he would throw up after tasting the small tomato-covered fish for the first time. Instead, his eyes opened bright with energy and sparkling with enthusiasm. “I like that!” he exclaimed as his fork pierced another fleshy piece. With a mouth full of canned herring he questioned, “Why haven’t I ever tried that before?” 2006 is going to be a great year.

Unfortunately, my youngest progeny does not intent to stop with seafood products. He announced that starting January 1, 2006, he would be going with a new hairstyle. “I’m going to be bald.” We smiled, patronizingly. “That’s cute dear, now eat your sardines.”

You need to know that there is a debate in our home about hair. My wife is a little more conservative when it comes to hairstyles. As for me, I do not think it is big a deal if my son or daughter wants to wear their hair a particular way. It is their hair and it can always be cut again and always grows back. Besides, it gives us something to laugh at years from now when we look at years books. My oldest son’s hair has been longer than his mother’s for the last few years. I don’t like it but I’m not going to fight it. Someday, he will decide what looks better and will cut it that way. For now, he is very cute and needs some lipstick to complete the look. But who am I to judge?

My daughter decided five years ago that she wanted Corn Rows. Because we are good, loving parents, we had her transported down to 38th street to have her strawberry-blonde locks and tresses twisted into painful knots. She endured the pain and now it makes for one of my favorite school pictures.

So, to make a long story short, Ben is bald. Not just a short buzz. I’m talkin’ smoother than a cue ball. My daughter says he looks like a cancer patient. My older son says it makes his ears look big. My wife isn’t saying anything. I think it reveals a bold, daring, and adventurous character who isn’t afraid to try new things.

But I’ll be honest…it is only January 1 and I am very afraid for the remaining 364 days of this new year.

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